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.... Still Has That Great Review Taste

They've Spelt Whyline wrong
Skyline, hereafter known as Whyline, asks just that. Why? what is the point of this movie? So much so that when the credits started to roll I wasn't sure whether to punch the screen, be thankful I hadn't paid to watch it,  or contemplate building a time machine to stop myself from wasting an hour and a half of my life.

Normally when writing these reviews I've got to find away of telling you why a movie is terrible (and it is almost always terrible) without giving away any spoilers or telling the story for you. Well fortunately with Skyline that isn't a problem because this movie doesn't have one. This movie wants to be War of the Worlds so bad if it was a teenage boy it would have spunk-laden posters of H.G.Wells all over it's walls.

Skyline incorporates the one of a kind acting talents of Donald (still masturbates to scrubs) Faison and David (look at how tough I am) Zayas, I use term 'one of a kind' to mean that I pray they give up acting forever so I can return to my (overly cynical) life without the flashbacks from the post-traumatic stress caused by watching their 'acting'; especially you Faison, or did you spend all your Scrubs money on experimental anti-acting pills?  

This movie lacks even the most basic of film requirements in that it doesn't have a beginning or an end, just a middle, a very dull poorly acted middle. What's that Obi-wan? No story? I thought it was about aliens?... Well yes I'll give you that, the movie is definitely about aliens, as a matter of fact the movie may as well have just been ALIENS in bold  72pt font for the entire 94 minutes of running time.


Q: Why are the aliens here?
A: ALIENS

Q: What do the aliens want?
A: ALIENS

Q: What is something you shouldn't ever base an entire storyline around?
A: ALIENS






There, just saved you 94 minutes of your life.

All hail

23 comments:

  1. D31 January 2011 at 07:55

    I unfortunately watched this movie a week or two ago.

    It's among the worst pieces of shit I've ever seen.

    wtf @ him becoming an alien and you're 100% right about it not having a beginning or end.


    turrible. just. turrible.

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  2. Anonymous31 January 2011 at 08:11

    Thanks for the timesave, was thinking on going to watch it, but it seems that its not a big deal

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  3. my day in a sentence31 January 2011 at 08:30

    I was at a mate of mine one day, drinking coffe, chilling, etc. And his roommate outs this on. We lold so hard. One of the worst movies I've ever seen. And I saw Shaolin soccer. :D
    Following and supporting!

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  4. level85nerd31 January 2011 at 08:32

    Thanks for the review. Looks pretty good, i think.

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  5. LauraJayne9131 January 2011 at 08:33

    I wouldnt choose to watch it again but it was the smallest bit interesting. However, no beginning or end :/ A huge let down.

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  6. Gooner Thoughts31 January 2011 at 08:34

    great review, also great concept to make your blog stand out

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  7. Anonymouse31 January 2011 at 09:20

    wow, never seen it. thanks for the review.

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  8. stan31 January 2011 at 09:41

    thanks for review helped me a lot

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  9. Nik Mekeena31 January 2011 at 10:12

    nice review, nice blog too!

    you should follow me:
    http://nmekeena.blogspot.com/

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  10. ZygoteWashington31 January 2011 at 10:40

    I remember seeing the trailers and kind of just disregarding them with a "meh". Is it bad that I'm starting to lose some of my faith in film?

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  11. shishimaru31 January 2011 at 10:52

    This is one of those movies where from the trailer I kinda wanted to see it tho I was expecting it to be meh, good to know it sucks as I havent seen it, and now, I wont >:3

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  12. Ante Babaja31 January 2011 at 11:19

    i dont like this movie

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  13. Kai Drakken31 January 2011 at 11:25

    Me and some friend do a regular Horrible Movie Night every other Monday. Maybe I should recommend this movie, if it's really that bad.

    Check me out at:
    http://brassdragons.blogspot.com/

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  14. Franco31 January 2011 at 11:48

    i thought this movie was good, but anyway, thanks for saving my money

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  15. AbstractReality31 January 2011 at 11:51

    Never heard of it

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  16. Frisky Bacon31 January 2011 at 12:03

    I accutally kinda liked the movie. Also followed

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  17. Oscrv31 January 2011 at 13:02

    I really want to watch the movie now but i never heard of it

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  18. Anonymous31 January 2011 at 15:18

    I think they were just trying to go for a different movie style; anyone can follow the basic plot line, and most everyone does.

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  19. Nathaniel31 January 2011 at 15:41

    wow even the trailer is boring, I'll make sure I don't waste my time watching this movie.

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  20. CreamSodaAndWhiskey31 January 2011 at 18:10

    Did not enjoy this film at all.

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  21. Gooner Thoughts31 January 2011 at 18:59

    no idea what the guy above says, i actually liked it

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  22. What a wonderful world1 February 2011 at 02:20

    This movie is just okay.

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  23. Weirdwhirl2 February 2011 at 03:09

    Same as with transformers, go there for the visuals, not the plot.

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